now that the election is over

and i don't feel compelled to watch msnbc every waking moment...i can catch up on my yes, dear viewing. now in HD!

hey guy that always has to stand up and dance at a show where everyone else is sitting

we get it. you are way more of a fan than the rest of us. the music compels you to stand up and shake your ass. and the sooner you recognize the song the more we marvel at what a big fan you are of the band that we thought we were really big fans of. you shame us. sitting, nodding our heads in rhythm. listening and watching is clearly not enough. if we can't wave or hands in the air and awkwardly try to high five our friend while they remain seated then we have proven nothing. we are posers. heaven help us if we try to get you to sit so every single other person there can perhaps see the show. who do we think we are? not real fans, that much i know. so, guy who is standing at a show where everyone else is sitting...guy encouraging us to do the same because clearly it is the path to fun...guy sitting down during the new songs that you are not familiar with but getting right back up when the 20 year old overplayed hit kicks in...you, sir are a maverick. a true original. no one does what you do. except the other guy at the other show. the one mouthing all the words. but you two, well, you and all the others at all the other shows, you are one of a kind.

a whole nother blog

i was about to rant and stuff about a commercial where a woman looks right at the camera (straight into my soul) and says..."whole nother". i imagined it to be "hole nuther" because when i hear nother i assume idiot. see, my spell check is underlining each nother i type. yet, this:
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/nother

i don't want to sound like my uncle here but isn't "another" and/or "whole other" what we mean to say? i get the laziness. i get how it is easier to say. i get my hypocrisy because i use me and so-and-so because it just sounds less pompous than so-and-so and i. i get that i have completely undermined my argument by having it come out stream of conscious style. if i keep talking i might be able to come to a third conclusion. perhaps a whole nother me and so-and-so. well, i guess if you thought i was stubborn we have all learned not judge me so rationally. what i say and what i say don't always jive. still, that won't stop me from arguing that it does. or doesn't. depends on which side you take

i did not shower today

i fundamentally changed the smell of my body

i've been watching so much msnbc

henry paulsen was in m dream last night.

death magnet

yep. i'm 38 and i am about to say that at times the new metallica gives me chills. trust me, i did not think this would be the case. i had hoped that it would not embarrass me at best. yes, i take it personally. i won't go into it at length but i felt like the time could not be more right for metallica to regain some of their passed glory but also felt there was not a band more ripe to completely fail. i am therefor blown away that metallica has remembered all the things that make metal, shall i say, fun. i know what you are thinking but i stand by that. because big fat riffs and raging guitar solos and all that, when done right, just makes me smile, man. and to hear metallica, fucking metallica, remember at a time that i also remember, well, it gives me chills. fuck you.

that time you realize

man, i kind of just don't dig my face. i shaved myself clean and, after a moment of novelty, i just thought that i am not into looking at myself this way. other people have faces and they look fine. i used to walk around this way most of my first 34 years. now i think my mouth is too small and my eyebrows just alone hanging out on my forehead. maybe it's my need for symmetry. my sideburns are less fashion and more based on the notion that if my hair goes down in the back then maybe it should have a similar look on the other side of my ears. whatever the reason, one day later i am not clean shaven. i am in day 2 of growing back my beard.