i got $8 for my husband's gold fillings

i'm going to quiznos. thanks gold4cash.com!

maria informed me

getting into heated exchanges at 3am in the ukrainian village/edge of humbolt park might not be the wisest thing to do. fair enough. fair enough

drunk guy gets in a shouting match in front of my place at like 3am

hey, that was me. funny story: seems i was a little drunk (explained elsewhere to mean i was in a really good mood, felt fine physically, was with people i liked, and had 3 beers) when i rode onto my street, which is narrow, made more narrow by banks of snow. i live literally half a block in from the intersection but this guy, this suv motherfucker, feels the need to honk at me as i am getting over to dismount and carry my bike to my steps. as he passed (key point. he is now already passed me) i asked him where he'd like me to ride. i often ask this of folks that honk before even giving me a chance to try to move. little did i know this guy was an angry man. he yells that he does not care where i ride. i try to point out that i cannot ride anywhere but where i am riding for the snow and such. well he still does not care. at this juncture he is yelling at me while leaning out of his open door. as far as i can tell he is questioning my sexuality. he has deduced that i might be queer. i think it's all the bike riding. gay gay gay. the details of the continuing encounter are not terribly compelling. we go back and forth and i am unusally aggressive in trying to get to the bottom of this. at one point i tell him clearly we can't agree on anything and that maybe he should shut his door and just carry on. he was, i say, just in a big rush but now seems to have all the time in the world to tell me where he would like to shove my bike (hint: my ass). the thing i guess i don't realize is that it is 3am and i'm yelling on the street in front of my place. loud enough that when i get to the door kyle is there opening it. nice. for one night i got to be that "who the fuck is shouting?!" guy. cool

now that the election is over

and i don't feel compelled to watch msnbc every waking moment...i can catch up on my yes, dear viewing. now in HD!

hey guy that always has to stand up and dance at a show where everyone else is sitting

we get it. you are way more of a fan than the rest of us. the music compels you to stand up and shake your ass. and the sooner you recognize the song the more we marvel at what a big fan you are of the band that we thought we were really big fans of. you shame us. sitting, nodding our heads in rhythm. listening and watching is clearly not enough. if we can't wave or hands in the air and awkwardly try to high five our friend while they remain seated then we have proven nothing. we are posers. heaven help us if we try to get you to sit so every single other person there can perhaps see the show. who do we think we are? not real fans, that much i know. so, guy who is standing at a show where everyone else is sitting...guy encouraging us to do the same because clearly it is the path to fun...guy sitting down during the new songs that you are not familiar with but getting right back up when the 20 year old overplayed hit kicks in...you, sir are a maverick. a true original. no one does what you do. except the other guy at the other show. the one mouthing all the words. but you two, well, you and all the others at all the other shows, you are one of a kind.

a whole nother blog

i was about to rant and stuff about a commercial where a woman looks right at the camera (straight into my soul) and says..."whole nother". i imagined it to be "hole nuther" because when i hear nother i assume idiot. see, my spell check is underlining each nother i type. yet, this:
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/nother

i don't want to sound like my uncle here but isn't "another" and/or "whole other" what we mean to say? i get the laziness. i get how it is easier to say. i get my hypocrisy because i use me and so-and-so because it just sounds less pompous than so-and-so and i. i get that i have completely undermined my argument by having it come out stream of conscious style. if i keep talking i might be able to come to a third conclusion. perhaps a whole nother me and so-and-so. well, i guess if you thought i was stubborn we have all learned not judge me so rationally. what i say and what i say don't always jive. still, that won't stop me from arguing that it does. or doesn't. depends on which side you take

i did not shower today

i fundamentally changed the smell of my body